Sunday, September 20, 2015

Up To My Eyeballs

   These are strange times we live in.  Constantly, I'm reminded that I have very little control over events in my life.  What I mean is one can be the most careful and methodical individual out on the streets and still have something totally bizarre happen to them, simply because they're out on the streets.  I often have to remind myself that I can't completely control my surroundings.  I can only control how I react to them.  Unfortunately, at times this has been a rather difficult lesson for me to learn.
   A few weeks ago I received a refresher course regarding this mindset when suddenly I found myself stranded in the middle of what I now refer to as a Biblical storm.  Now to give you a little history on my record of being stranded in bad weather I will state that this was not my first rodeo.  As cautious as I claim to be I'll also admit to not being the best at paying attention to my surroundings. This fact seems to go double when I'm driving.  Examples supporting this statement can be found in the multiple vehicles I have backed into, the several buildings and pylons I've scraped, and of course, there was that shopping cart I ran over that one time.  In my defense, I will say that someone else had obviously hit it before I did.  Maybe it was a magical shopping cart that became invisible when putting a ring around it's whee....that's just too stupid to even finish.  Anyway, I admit to not being the best driver.  I blame my super rad stereo and satellite radio because nothing distracts a person more than a little Zeppelin turned up to I right?....right?
   Due to this chronic problem I have with lack of attention, there has been several times I've been stuck in bad weather while driving.  There was that one time in college I decided to take my '78 Cutlass Supreme out on a country road to watch a, "lighting storm," that ended up a deluge causing my vehicle to drift off the road and into the middle of some farmer's field.  To make a bad situation worse, this particular evening I neglected to put shoes on before leaving the house and had to walk barefoot back to town in water that was at least up to mid calf in some areas.  How I didn't end up with Giardia I'll never know.  Reflecting on it now, I guess this particular evening was really more an example of stupidity rather than lack of attention.
   There was also that time I decided to drive to Fargo in January by myself and hit the most terrifying white out blizzard conditions I've ever experienced.  Somehow I was able to find the exit to a rest stop out in the middle of absolutely nowhere and proceeded to wait for about five hours until the interstate was open for travel again.  Fear not though, I was not totally alone at that rest stop.  Yes, it was me and about twenty truckers hunkered down for the long haul.  I will say the men that I was stuck with that day were thankfully very nice.  Some even bordered on too nice, asking me if I would like to sit in their trucks with them to warm up.  While I suspect these strangers had no real ill-intentions I respectfully declined their offers and spent a lot of that day sitting in my own vehicle by myself.  The one thing I won't forget was how a number of those drivers pulled their semis up in order to completely surround my substantially smaller Mitsubishi and protect it from the unbelievable beating wind and snow.  
   So I guess the other week when the sky turned blood red and locusts came pouring out...okay, maybe it wasn't that bad, but it was bad enough to turn my normally fifteen minute drive into a three and a half hour odyssey.  Who knew that insane lightening and thunder were signs that I should call it a day and high tail it home?  We're talking a wall of water coming down around my car.  We're talking peoples' vehicles stuck in puddles of water deep enough to go up to their thighs.  We're talking literally water coming at me on the road in rapids on a residential street!  That friends is when one WAVES the white flag, stops at a subway restaurant, and orders a sandwich...not, to go. 
   In closing, I'm writing this post because I realize there are very few things I can control in life. During my 36 years on this earth I've experienced several, "Oh shit, this could be very bad," moments.  Considering this, I'm thankful for every time I remember to wear shoes, every truck driver that talks to me, and every meatball sub I get to enjoy.  I'm also extremely happy every chance I get to dress like a lady that has her stuff together enough to pay attention to what's going on around her. I can guarantee that this type of woman does not get herself in a position where her moccasins get wet.

Shirt:  7 for all mankind
T Shirt:  (Purchased at a Paul McCartney concert in Fargo, ND. "2014 Tour")
Jeans:  Henry & Belle
Boots:  Thrifted
Purse:  Kate Spade
Earrings:  Dead Things
Bracelets:  Thrifted
Sunglasses:  Coach

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