I've always considered myself to be a true creature of habit. However, recently it was brought to my attention by a friend that I may be a titch more than that. Actually, I believe the exact statement she made regarding my behavior was that, "I was Rain Man."
Now, considering my name is Rayna and Rain Man is really not that far of a stretch phonetically I thought this statement was rather witty at first. Okay actually it was pretty juvenile, but hey, stupidity is generally amusing, right? It wasn't until I really started exploring the reasons she labeled me this that I became paranoid about my little idiosyncrasies...my admittedly many little idiosyncrasies.
I guess I always just thought I liked routine. Yes, I park my car in the same parking spot at work every day. Now maybe I've been known to get a little bent out of shape when someone parks in my spot. Okay, and there were those few times I considered playing chicken against other vehicles who somehow seemed unaware that this spot belonged to me...in my mind...which obviously should make it law to everyone else. It's not that my parking spot is special, sheltered, or even close to the building I work in. It's just where my car goes. I think of it like the closet I put my clothes in. One does not leave their clothes just strewn about anywhere. At least this person does not.
Back to the topic of routine, I also strongly prefer to eat at certain times. For example, the idea of eating lunch at 3 PM is extremely stressful to me. How can I possibly eat lunch at 3 when my evening meal is certainly going to be somewhere between 6 and 8 PM? That's simply not enough time to digest in between sittings!
I also catch a lot of flak for eating the same things on a regular basis. I mean, so what if I like Starkist tuna kits, pistachios, and zebra cakes? These items make a very inexpensive lunch and do not require the use of a microwave or refrigerator if you're on the go. Also, I do drink a Perrier everyday but how is that any different than the hordes of individuals slugging down Mountain Dew daily...before breakfast I may add!
I really don't think it's that odd to park in the same spot every day, keep one's meals on a regular schedule, and repeat a lot of the same menu options. Of course, I also don't think it's weird to; paint my nails every Thursday night, watch a foreign movie every Sunday night, light a candle every time I sit down for dinner, give the cat exactly three treats per day, define in private every morning what my favorite moment of the previous day was, vacuum one, AND ONLY ONE, area rug in my home each day in a feeble attempt to eventually clean the entire house, never eat and drive at the same time, talk to my brother on the phone every weekend for a minimum of two hours at a time, if avoidable never stay out past 11 PM at night, and definitely no late night snacking because I saw, "Gremlins," man and bad stuff happens when one hits the fried chicken after midnight. Lastly, I spend almost every day I have off reading novels at Starbucks and drinking tall decaf vanilla lattes, (I've been considering hazelnut lately, but the idea kinda gives me the wiggins still.)
Basically if these little habits make me weird, than weird I am. Just think, these are only the quirks I feel comfortable sharing with the public. As I was presenting my concerns of potentially being a real life, "Rain Man," with my father he said something rather profound to me. "Weirdness is not a disease," he said. For a hypochondriac like me it was one of the most comforting things I'd ever heard.
In closing, I would like to state that I have currently decided I do not have Autism. Yes, I like to play the 80's station on the radio at work only on Sundays, and admittedly I hit the lock button on my car exactly three times when I'm getting out of it. However, I'm aware that these are conscious choices I've been making. These habits are things that I choose to continue doing because they make me feel comfortable and in control of an otherwise unpredictable life. At any point I can change my game plan and pick another one of the, "Doors of Perception." I want to clarify for all you Aldous Huxley fans this choice would be sans peyote. I don't really think that's a habit I'm ready to pick up at this point. (Yes I know it's really a stretch, but how else was I going to tie this whole rant in with the above outfit?) Now, enough with all this deep thinking the cat is waiting for his three treats and he has a schedule to keep.
-r.
Shirt: Forever 21
Shorts: Thrifted
Boots: Thrifted
Purse: Frye
Bracelets: Thrifted
Sunglasses: Vintage
Jim would be pleased that mentioned Aldous Huxley's The Doors of Perception and that you still wear shirts with his photo on them. However, using mescaline and/or indulging in a lifestyle similar to his would not be wise. I'm just sayin' !
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