During the course of my life, I have had several people comment that upon first meeting me they were intimidated. In fact, I believe the actual word they used was scared. Due to the amount of times I have actually heard this from people, I have found myself getting paranoid. Scared?!...of what? How could they be scared of little old me? What vibe do I give off that could possible unnerve people?
Ok, so I may not be the most smiley person upon a first encounter. As I've stated before I need a genuine reason to smile. I can't help if my everyday expression comes off as a, "cold, dark stare." Maybe it's just how I pluck my eyebrows. Besides, it's kinda my signature thing. I also acknowledge I can be a tad decisive. One may even define it as pushy, verging on bossy at times. I like to view it as confident but whatever, "potato, potato."
I am pleased to report that most individuals who confessed to being, "scared," of me upon meeting, are some of my closest friends. We are able to laugh about the, "cold, dark stare," now, virtually rendering it powerless. That is of course, until it is needed and unfortunately, sometimes, it is needed.
While the holidays are defined as a rather magical time of year they can also be extremely stressful. Working in the field of retail, I feel extra exposed to not only my own holiday stress, but the anxieties of the general public as well. People seem worried about hosting parties, making impressions, money, traveling, and most of all time. About a month into the season, I begin to question if anyone is really enjoying this time of year? Could it be that everyone is just faking a, "Merry Christmas?"
Here is where the, "cold, dark stare," comes in to play. With all this stress going on I find it nearly impossible to fake that, "jolly," smile. Add the rather confrontation manner of the general public this time of year and all bets are off on my facial expressions.
However, being female I think I'm expected to always be smiling. In addition, I believe women are generally expected to be nice and agreeable. These are all admirable qualities that I possess when the situation calls for it. Unfortunately, regarding certain scenarios, I also possess the opposite of these qualities. Due to this fact, I have been subjected to certain confrontations that may not have always made me appear, "lady like."
I guess my overall point here is that for many, the holiday season can be stressful. The key word being, MANY. So in order to avoid a, "confrontation Christmas," it is key to regard the situations of others and don't take things too personally. A, "cold, dark stare," may just be an individual zoning out about their personal financial woes. A pushy request could just be someone desperate to make the right decision. Finally, I hope someday the public will understand that women are not always smiley. We have a lot of stress too! I mean, who else is going to clean the house, do the shopping, wrap the gifts, cook the meal, host the party, and remember the cat litter in between shifts at work. It is hard to remember to smile. Maybe, if I could just remember to stop swearing so much...
-r.
Coat: Tulle
Sweater Vest: Thrifted (Savers - Ugly Sweater Rack)
Shirt: 7 For All Mankind
Jeans: Kasil
Boots: Born
Purse: Vintage (John Romain)
Mittens: Handmade (Purchased at a craft fair)
Bracelet: Free People
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